The Bones Christmas Episodes, Ranked

Even the biggest fans of Bones — Hart Hanson's procedural series starring Emily Deschanel and David Boreanaz that ran for 12 years and as many seasons — probably don't associate the show with Christmas, and that's perfectly fair. Over those 12 seasons, the show, which can get pretty dark at times, has largely eschewed holiday episodes for case-of-the-week style installments as well as overarching storylines (a a lot serial killers tend to attack the main characters of "Bones", which is probably one of the least realistic aspects of the show). So what about the few Christmas-themed episodes of "Bones"? Are they good?

In fact, they are! While the Christmas episodes probably won't make the list the best of 246 episodesonly three center around Christmas, and each one is pretty solid. Even sweeter, Best of All even has a guest star you'll probably recognize from another hit Fox show (which also happens to be connected to one of the show's leads). Here are the three Bones Christmas episodes, ranked from "pretty good" to "actually awesome."

Santa in the Sleet (Season 3, Episode 9)

If your kids still believe in Santa Claus, definitely do no let them watch "Santa in the Sleet", the ninth episode of the third season of "Bones". (To be honest, they probably shouldn't be watching most of "Bones" anyway.) In this episode, forensic anthropologist Temperance Brennan (Emily Deschanel) and her FBI colleague Seely Booth (David Boreanaz) spend their days before christmas researching death. of Santa Claus shopping center whose body was found in a sewage (obviously someone I wasn't really feeling the holiday spirit). The whole thing gets a little weirder when Brennan and Booth discover that this mall Santa worked hard for his job - his legal name was Christopher Kringle and he was one of the best Santas in the business.

As they investigate, Brennan deals with the fact that she would like to spend Christmas with her father and brother - even though they are both in jail awaiting trial - and must face their prosecutor Caroline Julian (Patricia Belcher). The problem is, Caroline has a huge crush on Booth, so she'll grant Brennan's request if she can kiss him under the mistletoe. To be honest, The Santa in the Slush is at the bottom of this list mostly because of how weird it is... even though it's Brennan who kisses Booth at the end of the day.

The Man in the Fallout Shelter (Season 1, Episode 9)

The first Christmas episode of "Bones" definitely stands the test of time. The ninth episode of the show's inaugural season, "The Man in the Fallout," opens on December 23, with Booth bringing a skeleton to the Jeffersonian Institute, which, it turns out, was originally a fallout. While cutting into the skeleton, Dr. Zack Addy (Eric Millegan) sets off the institute's biohazard alarm, trapping everyone and placing them in quarantine.

Brennan gets a little silly for once in this episode—the drugs administered to the Jeffersonian staff cause a sense of euphoria, which affects her more than anyone else—as the team works together to determine the identity of the skeleton, who turns out to be an avid collector of coins killed by a man who wanted to steal his rare collection. Booth and Brennan contact Lionel's ex-lover Ivy (Margaret Avery) to explain why he disappeared, and the audience learns more about the families of the people who work at the Jeffersonian. (We meet Booth's son and also find out that Michaela Conlin's Angela Montenegro is the daughter of ZZ Top member Billy Gibbons, who appears several more times throughout the series.) "The Man in the Fallout Shelter" is a pretty pivotal episode of "Bones," and it's a wonderful Christmas episode to boot.

The Goop on the Girl (Season 5, Episode 10)

The reason The Goop on the Girl is the best Bones Christmas episode is completely unrelated to its (admittedly awkward) title — it's the best Bones Christmas episode because Zooey Deschanel is in it. In case you haven't put the pieces together yet, Emily and Zooey Deschanel are sisters in real life, and although the "New Girl" star isn't the only real-life relative of a cast member to appear on "Bones," she is certainly one of the most famous. The entire episode begins with Booth and Brennan investigating the death of yet another Santa impersonator, except this one wasn't such a good guy; he dies because he goes into a bank dressed as Santa Claus and detonates a bomb. The rubber-covered girl referred to in the title is Georgia Hartmeyer (Melinda Page Hamilton), a witness who turns out to be part of the bank robbery.

So who plays Zooey? She plays Brennan's cousin Margaret Whitesell—and even though she's a distant relative, Booth relentlessly points out that Brennan and Maggie look enough alike that they could definitely be sisters. Although Brennan initially clashes with Maggie, the two end up bonding over Christmas dinner featured in the episode, and it's pretty awesome to see the real-life Deschanel sisters on screen together.

"Bones," including all three Christmas episodes, is now streaming on Hulu.



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