The phrase "direct-to-video" is particularly associated with low-budget projects that cannot guarantee a wide theatrical release. Usually, this is the right logic to follow. However, there is one 1996 film that defies all calling logic. Theodore Rex - the $33.5 million buddy cop science-fiction film starring Whoopi Goldberg and George Newbern, the film's famous anthropomorphic dinosaur, portrayed with a little too much enthusiasm.Father of the bride).
As always, I'm a big fan of "so bad they're good" titles. Theodore Rex It's one of those movies that confuses me until I'm on my deathbed. Moreover, I feel that New Line Cinema is aware of this fact, which is why you can't find this movie anywhere. Streaming Forum on this article.
Future dino detectives?
Theodore Rex It wastes no time insulting your intelligence by telling you everything you need to know with a Star Wars-style exposition scroll at the front of the film.
There's a mischievous and lovable dinosaur named Theodore Rex, a future cop named Katie Coltrane (Ya Goldberg) who's tasked with solving a murder case against her will, a disgruntled and rough-around-the-edges future cop out to restore her badge and a crime scene involving a dead dinosaur by an evil billionaire named Elizar. To create a big conspiracy He did. Ken (Armin Müller-Stahl) wants to use fish DNA to bring about a new Ice Age… for a reason.
Confusing character design
About the most annoying part Theodore Rex His character is a design. I believe that walking and talking dinosaur puppets would look cool to the light-hearted in the mid-90s, no matter what the hell movie, but their personalities make absolutely no sense, and they seem made for that. “Haha, that's random!” with the sole purpose of making the audience groan at the screen.
For example, Theodore Rex has an automated cookie shooter in his penthouse apartment when he wants a snack. Let's put this aside for a second because our dino detective hero is low on the public relations totem pole, and only because I wish Being a policeman in the first act.
How does Theodore Rex afford this lifestyle, and why does he love cookies so much?
What are you doing to make seemingly endless white chocolate macadamia nut cookies in an apartment so huge and ready to serve? Frasier Will Crane be jealous of his living conditions? Is the cookie cutter custom made? At least we know his giant tailgating van was bought with taxpayer money, but I have no compelling reason to believe Theodore Rex has "cookie cutter money" around by any stretch of the imagination.
Also, Theodore, as well as the rest of the dinosaurs who have been integrated into society created by evil man, For reasons that are not fully explained, they all decide they don't want to be carnivores. If I had to guess, this idiom was established to make the dinosaurs in this universe a little more ambiguous.
Whoopi Goldberg didn't want to be there.
In a 2015 interview with Folha de S. Paulo, WP Goldberg She didn't mince her words when she said she didn't want to become a star. Theodore Rex. In fact, producer Richard Gilbert Abramson filed a $20 million lawsuit against Goldberg in 1992 when she tried to get out of the film's production, claiming she had made a verbal agreement to star as Katy Coltrane. Forward with the project, but her disdain is evident in every frame.
There is no single line. Theodore Rex "I can't believe I'm saying these words out loud" is not accompanied by a look of horror on Goldberg's face. Also, it's not revealed that Katie Coltrane is a cyborg until the third act, which doesn't help the plot in any way, except for the fact that it explains why she's been wandering around so enthusiastically - following a laser pointer like a drugged cat - for most of the movie. Part of me wonders if this revelation was simply added to the script to explain the soullessness of Goldberg's acting and line delivery.
WP Goldberg He was paid $7 million to star. Theodore Rex.
There is no problem if you want to pass on this
Theodore Rex It's not available anywhere on stream, which is probably for humanity's benefit. Humanity is filled with endless technological innovations, multiple wars, economic problems, famine, corruption, advertising, get-rich-quick schemes, and political divisions that will probably get worse before things get better. For most people, they sit down to watch Theodore Rex It can be something that pushes them over the edge as a way to escape the horrors of modern life.
I'm mourning my 92 minutes. Theodore RexAll hope is not lost. I've seen this movie so you don't have to. But if you're a glutton for punishment, you can probably find every single copy of this movie at the bottom of a translation pit that's been around for decades.
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